Boob Out And Singing Moana
Yesterday I achieved the impossible. I took Noah and Winnie out all day by myself to London. We went to my beautiful friend Emma’s house to play with her little ones. This part was fine, traffic on the M25 sucked but both babies slept for the worst of it so I got a few minutes to sing along to grown up songs instead of Moana on repeat.
Once we arrived, Noah was a bit of a pest and kept drinking every two seconds because they had an ice machine on the fridge and the temptation was too much to resist! This obviously meant that on the way home, Noah instantly needed a wee and then again 20 minutes later and again and again. Driving through central London at 16:30 made this pretty frustrating. We ended up going to the Brent Cross shopping centre to get dinner and obviously go for a wee.
This was a mistake, I should have just gone to McDonalds, why did I think “Yeah let’s try and get Yo Sushi by ourselves without daddy to chase after the wild one.”
Yep never again, not until Noah is old enough to understand the concept of ‘Help yourself’ and that it is not the same as ‘Please lick which ever bowl you would like then change your mind’.
Trying to contain two hungry, overtired little people that just wanted to get under the table or go for 10 wees and on top of it attempt to eat with chopsticks during this time! Impossible, honestly I’m getting McDonalds next time!
We paid pretty quickly after Noah almost kicked the lady behind him practicing his Tree Foo Tom moves and Winnie poured a pot of Soy Sauce on herself. We once again ventured to the toilets, this time before we got there Noah decided weeing in the buggy was easier so we ended up standing in the middle of the ladies toilet cleaning and changing him. This whole event with Winnie in the ring sling and laughing every time I had to lean forward to get something else from under the buggy.
It must have been an event to watch as at least 3 women gave us the ‘Uh children are disgusting’ look. Cheers ladies, good luck with yours in the future!
Finally got back to the car and Winnie decided it was her time in the lime light. She shouted at me for a good 20 minutes before I could pull over and feed her. This, lucky for me, meant a dingy petrol station forecourt with my boob out in the car and singing Moana to keep Noah happy.
Our car obviously thought I hadn’t had enough entertainment for the evening so decided to keep turning the engine off every few minutes, to save power apparently. For me this just meant that every few minutes the engine went off and all the lights came on, highlighting to everyone around that I was actually sitting with my boob out and singing Moana. They couldn’t see Noah through the tinted glass and Winnie was laying across my lap so really I could have charged for tickets for the entertainment value I bought to some lucky people last night! As Maui would say “You’re welcome!”
Today I did some temp work in an office just inputting questionnaire responses on to the computer for 6 hours… It was a nice rest!
Written By The Spilt Milk